Dear addiction.... A letter to my boyfriends addiction.

by Mel
(USA)

Dear addiction,

This morning as I prayed to God, a thought flashed through my mind. It told me to write this evil a letter, and right behind it was the discernment that God had just spoken to me. So I immediately picked up pen and paper and began to pour my feelings. So Here I am addiction, with something you will never have and that’s God on your side. I don’t care how powerful you might be or how much you mean to him, I will help him defeat you. You know I hate you, and I’m sure you hate me too. Nothing has made me cry as much as you have. What gives you the right to take the only man I have ever loved away? What gives you the right to put negative thoughts in his head? Why the fuck do make me so vulnerable and him so powerful? I will never understand you. However today I’m going to make you understand me. You have robbed me once before and destroyed a solid 4 year relationship. So, how did you make him forget about all the memories we build? Does he not remember august 31st, 2005? The day he asked me out so romantically and made the happiest girl alive. Or the days we would spend talking and laughing on the phone, the 1st time we held hands at Harpers Ferry, or the awkward first kiss. Well addiction he might have forgotten those memories but I never will. You are the sole cause of all the pain he makes me feel. Just when I think your gone and life is a fairytale again you come back to stab me in the heart, and it hurts so damn much. You are why he doesn’t want to get a steady job. You are why he is not motivated to get his license. You are why his not confident enough to make love to me. You are why he cheated on me. You are why he thinks there is no future. You are the root to all my suffering. It is because of you, he thinks he is a bad ass and the world owes him a favor. You are why he steals and ignores his conscience. It’s because of you he has to live half alive. I want to grab you from his body and rip you to pieces. You will not manipulate me anymore. Enough is enough. We both know one of us must go at the end and can only hope and pray that will be you.

This letter made me feel so much better!! thank you God. If anyone needs any help you can email me at 100things2do@gmail.com. Thanks for your time.




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Jun 19, 2011
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To Mel
by: Rae

Mel,

Thanks for writing! It sounds like you have a lot of knowledge and experience with addiction in your life. I'm sorry to hear that you are dealing with all of this, but you do have a lot of insight about the disease. I hope everything works out for you. I can relate to a lot of the things you wrote in your letter - I know how addiction robs us and our loved ones of our lives. It's a hard thing to deal with.

I always recommend some al-anon or nar-anon meetings (meetings for friends and family of people with addiction) if you haven't already tried them. Just a thought :)
I wish you guys nothing but the best..
feel free to come back and write anytime you want

Rae

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